Undeniable Chemistry, sparkling connection, and the beginning of the relationship will feel like a whirlwind of emotions. But amidst the starry nights, butterflies and a question that may linger is whether this is love or just lust.

Understanding the difference will help you in managing the initial stages of connection and it will steer your relationship that is long-lasting. In this blog, we’ll uncover the signs of each feeling and how they may influence your relationship as it deepens. This knowledge will be the guiding light on the path of connection.

The difference between “Love” and “Lust”

The beginning of a relationship can be a mix of emotions and there is that undeniable attraction and those heady first encounters and an excitement to know the person better. But the question arises is that:  is this a spark that will ignite lasting love or simply a flicker of desire? Love and Lust sometimes can be confusing but identifying the difference can be a valuable tool for finding the early stages of a relationship and setting yourself up for something long-term and fulfilling.

Love: Love goes beyond physical attraction and it is a deeper emotional connection that is formed on understanding, respect, and a genuine interest in your partner’s well-being.  It makes the sense of security that enables you to be your authentic self, vulnerabilities and all. It will grow stronger with time as you share experience, and support each other through life’s challenges. 

Love and lust are often thought of as two distinct feelings but anthropologists theorize they will exist on a spectrum that will be broken down into three categories:

Attraction: Also known as passionate love, attraction is associated with feelings of excitement, cravings for emotional connection, and intrusive thinking about the beloved. It can also imitate the feeling of drug addiction.   

Attachment: Known as companionate love, attachment is characterized by feelings of calm, security, and an emotional union. In long-term relationships, this mostly comes into play which includes families, friendships, and committed relationships.

Lust: The craving for sexual satisfaction drives humans to pursue sex partners. It is driven by the hormonal desire for sexual gratification.

The most understood distinction between love and lust is that it is purely sexual and physical while love includes affection, and care for someone well behind their function as a source of sexual gratification. 

How to identify between Love and Lust 

Love is a kaleidoscope of emotions that can leave both partners happy and confused. In the initial stages of a relationship, it can be hard to tell if that spark is love’s gentle flame or just a one-night stand. But if you are overwhelmed by your emotions then you may notice when you start having feelings for someone. But apparently, you do not know what feeling exactly you are feeling.

Let’s look at some of the apparent signs of love that are easy to stick to:

You feel emotionally attached.

Love goes beyond the physical. It is the deep emotional connection where you feel a sense of empathy and understanding for your partner.

Unlike lust, love brings together compassion and passion that will feel for your beloved. You also feel emotionally connected to your partner and what the other person is feeling. It matters to you how they feel. 

Research has suggested that emotional intimacy is an essential part of all loving relationships. In addition to sexual satisfaction, when you love someone, you pursue to build affection and intimacy.

You build plans for the future

Love is not just about whispered secrets and stolen glances. It is all about planning a future together. From planning trips to getting old together, you can make plans for the future that include the partner. It is an indicator that you see them as a part of your future.  

You can be emotionally vulnerable.

Love builds a safe space where you can be completely open and also shed your emotional armor. It also offers not just sexual fulfillment but also emotional satisfaction. A big part of this is the feeling of security and comfort that love offers ideally. Love gives you an avenue to be who you are and comfortably express flaws and vulnerabilities. Also, studies have shown that the positive reception of emotional vulnerability can boost a relationship. 

When you are genuinely in love, you don’t fear rejection and judgment and they will love you back too.

You are involved in their life.

Love makes the world intricately woven into yours. It makes you and the lover bound to each other in every way. Their problems, happiness, choices, and pain will impact how you feel. You do care about what happens in their professional and personal life.   

It takes time 

Just like lust’s fiery flash, love takes time to bloom. It has depth and breadth to it. Love becomes durable and more robust when you and the one you love can win the challenging situations together. Just like the two feelings, love can be powerful and overwhelming. But it is not as temporary as lust. When you are in love, it is harder to deal with the separation from the partner than you simply lust for them as you are more emotionally invested. 

Seamless communication

Conversations flow naturally and you will find yourself talking for hours without even realizing it. There is a comfortable silence too where you can simply enjoy each other’s presence.

Respectful Disagreements

Even if your opinions are different and you disagree, you can still have a healthy conversation without resorting to the ultimatums. Love needs respect which allows you to navigate differences constructively.

Lust: An intoxicating Sensation

Lust is an intoxicating sensation, a rush of excitement that makes your heart race and you have the sensation of sweating. But it is crucial to distinguish it from love's deeper connection. 

No curiosity about their life

Sparkling conversation is a hallmark of love, however, lust often lacks depth. You are interested in the physical attributes and sexual desire of the one that you are interested in. But anything apart from that is not something you feel interested in. You don’t need to get to know this person by talking to them about several things. When you have lustful feelings, you find yourself more lustful as it is your sexual satisfaction that matters to you the most. 

Overwhelmed by the thoughts of sex

When it takes the wheel, your focus shifts to the physical. Lusting over someone, your mind may be consumed by physical closeness and sexual fulfillment. It can also become obsessive and consuming for you. Your attraction towards someone else will become a crucial aspect of your life. Your desire for them becomes the main conduct. 

Living in the Present 

Lust in a relationship will make you hyper-focused on the present and what exactly you need right now. The difference between love vs lust is evident when you are not actively envisioning a future together. It is focused on instant sexual gratification, where you don’t have to think about whether you can stay in a long-term relationship with them. 

Unbothered by different values

Lust often overlooks differences in life goals. It can be about sexual compatibility and nothing else at times. Firstly, you don’t feel the requirement to figure out how the other person will feel about several things, what their values are, and what matters to them. Secondly, if you find out that they are opposing views then you are unaffected by them. You don’t spend time trying to figure out how the other person feels about different things, what their values are, and what exactly matters to them. Moreover, if you find out that they are opposing views and you are unaffected by them. Also, you don’t spend the time trying to change the opinion of the person in which you are involved and it does not make a difference in your life.   

More private time than the social or public one

Lust tends to crave privacy. A common among the signs of lust in women or men. However, physical signs of lust will include the time that you are willing to spend the bedroom with them instead of being around people. Also, lust entails the desire for constant sexual fulfillment that leads to most of your time being spent inside the bedroom. You don’t feel the requirement to go out on dates, engage with others as a couple, or get to know each other outside the room.  

The sudden shift in focus

Is it lust or love? Lust can be fleeting. Once the initial physical intensity fades away, the connection may frizzle out.

No cause with Jealousy

Healthy love makes security and trust. Possessiveness in lust can arise easily and it can be one of the subtle signs of lust in both genders.

Last But Not The Least

Lust can be a crucial part of a romantic relationship as long as it is expressed in ways that are safe, healthy, and consensual. It is easy to confuse love and lust and the two often occur together, significantly during the relationship’s initial stage “ The honeymoon Phase”. Identifying the differences includes the fact that love involves a more emotional connection while lust is more focused on physical attraction which will help you to tell if your partner is really in love or if it’s just lust. The bottom line is that the signs of lust in both women and men involve wanting to be physically with a person, while the signs of love focus on wanting to know more about the other person.